i took a walk and threw up in an english garden.

Sometimes I hate how immensely loyal I am. You know what? I know that I am, so I have every right to say it. I will defend your honour like it was my own, I will fight for you, I will keep your secrets 'til the day that I die.

You need to vent, I need to vent.

I dislike the fact that some people recognize this, but get shocked at the fact that I just drop people sometimes. The reason is simple: you do something to destroy the trust we built, you can forget about friendship. Why be friends with anyone if you can't trust them?

If you need me late at night, early in the morning, I will be there for you. I find it sad to say I've had friends in the past who would not do the same.

I really hate it when people get mad at me for dropping people, then coming back to me and saying something like, "Oh, you were so right. Why didn't I listen?". Yeah, why didn't you listen?

Don't get pissy with me if I choose not to talk to someone. I don't get pissy with you. I never really understood. If you can respect the ideas and thoughts of someone on something, anything, why can't you understand my desire to not talk to someone?

Are we so incapable of maintaining different groups of friends?

It bothers me because I am seen as an anomaly in the eyes of the "norm". I'm not patting myself on the back and saying, "Wow, I am so different, aren't I such a special snowflake.", I'm saying, I go with my gut. I don't like something, I'm out.

It saves the time and agony over whether so and so is mad at so and so. They don't talk, done. No drama.

You can stop trying to get me to change my ways, because this is how I was raised. Trust is vital; drama is not. I never try and change you. I give you my opinion and the logistics and I leave you at that. I never say anything that would create consequence if you didn't do it.

You're your own person; so am I.

So, as I utter an angry, shuddering breath, I am done. Fuck you.

--

My mind has been blissfully empty as of right now. No drama, no studying worries, no boys. Finally.

A good blissful ignorance.