Tuesday, March 19, 2013

why does it feel so good but hurt so bad?

I'm searching for excuses to fill my Smoothie King addiction. I just spent the last ten minutes looking up the health benefits to smoothies and bullshit. I just want to feel like I'm purging my system.

I mean, they don't really mention anything unhealthy, just the turbinado. Primarily, it's all fruits and natural juices.

Anyway.

It's so strange being a senior on the badminton team. I never really thought I'd actually make it here. Well, you know, of course I did, it's expected. But, now that it's here, it's really surreal. Like, the freshmen on the team this year are looking at me as the untouchable senior. They won't remember me past sophomore year, but occasionally they're come to mind. (It happens with me with my own senior class as a freshman. Fuck you, Arielle).

Today, Sam sent me a text message, out of the blue, saying, "I actually love you" and of course, I reacted as, "what did i do" because honestly I never know what I do to warrant a message like that.

And then she responded, "you are like my big sister". I just thought that was probably the nicest thing someone has said to me.

I'm trying really hard to be a mentor, a good one. I'm trying to teach people how not to freak out on the court and be better. I want to practice with people and teach them.

I break the badminton silence rule every day.

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